Romance Through Digital Avatars: Online Courtship, Representation and “Catfishing” Amongst Irregular Female Migrants in Sabah

Somiah, V. (2023) — New Media in the Margins
Synopsis

This chapter explores the phenomenon of romance scams, situating it within broader discussions of online fraud, victim vulnerabilities, and the lived experiences of those deceived. Romance scams are defined as fraudulent relationships constructed online for the purpose of extorting money, typically through websites, dating apps, and social media. They have gained global prominence in recent years, resulting in substantial financial losses and deep emotional harm to victims.

The chapter begins by outlining the structure of romance fraud schemes, drawing on Whitty’s persuasive techniques model. Offenders typically progress through stages: creating a fake profile, establishing trust, grooming the victim, requesting money, and in some cases escalating to sexual exploitation or repeat victimization. Unlike many other online scams, romance fraud relies heavily on emotional manipulation rather than one-off deception, often unfolding over extended periods of time.

A key theme is victim vulnerability. While romance scams affect diverse demographics, certain groups are disproportionately at risk. Middle-aged and older adults with disposable income, those experiencing loneliness or seeking companionship after divorce or widowhood, and individuals with idealized notions of love are particularly susceptible. However, the chapter also notes that educational attainment does not necessarily protect victims, as even highly educated individuals may be manipulated when strong emotions are involved.

The analysis further explores psychological impacts, emphasizing the “double hit” of victimization. Victims not only lose money but also grieve the perceived end of an intimate relationship. Many report that the emotional betrayal and collapse of trust are harder to process than financial loss. This aligns with prior criminological research that shows scams undermine both personal identity and social relationships.

The chapter also situates romance scams in the broader evolution of cybercrime. With increasing reliance on online dating and social networking platforms—now normalized as mainstream avenues for relationships—offenders have greater opportunities to reach potential victims globally. Coupled with anonymity, stolen identities, and sophisticated scripts, scammers create a convincing facade of legitimacy.

Importantly, the chapter highlights systemic challenges. Underreporting remains a persistent issue, with only a fraction of cases reaching authorities. Victims often feel ashamed or fear blame, which limits accurate statistics and impedes targeted prevention. Furthermore, prevention messaging has struggled to keep pace with offender innovation. Current advice often centers on “never send money,” but as frauds adapt to new tactics (including crypto-investment hybrids), such messaging risks obsolescence.

In conclusion, the chapter underscores the human cost of romance scams and the urgent need for victim-centered responses. This includes better support services, nuanced prevention campaigns that account for emotional as well as financial vulnerabilities, and adaptive strategies that anticipate future fraud evolutions. By situating romance scams in a wider criminological and psychological context, the chapter contributes to a deeper understanding of why these scams are so successful and devastating.
Citation style